Animated Falling Snow with Snowman SLOW DECEMBER... art cr
december 2022 diary
12.31.22 | ain't no party like a new year's party
feeling: happy happy happy
listening to/watching: queen bee again
eating/drinking: great grandmother's hot chocolate
content warnings: food talk i suppose?

the name of this entry is completely misleading- i'm actually not at a party at all. just reminscing of all those parties i've been to when i actually had friends in like elementary school-middle school. i'm not sure if i miss the amount of people there or all the drunk adults or all the screaming but i can't help but feel a little nostalgia for actually having all those hangouts like normal people do. thankfully, this new year's at least none of my friends are having hangouts so it's not like i'm missing anything by being in pennsylvania. so yeah, i'm spending my new year's in pennsylvania with my great grandmother and great aunt. i'm really excited for it if i'm being honest, though. i genuinely love being in pennsylvania because it means i get to be in this super grandmother aesthetic ass house. she has like over 200 bears in this house. i'm gonna count them when i have the time and update y'all

the food that was made for today was so fucking good. we had ribs, velveeta, and caesar salad. i had so many ribs i haven't had it in so long that i was just so excited for them. it tasted so good and i ate so much velveeta too. i seriously love when i actually like the food made. i'm super picky and have arfid so it's rare that i find full meals that i can super like and this was one of them. maybe this is sign of the new year being me liking the food i get! well. i doubt that actually. but one can wish

today i've been working on two things and that's my new roleplay server and my closed species. whether your opinion on closed species idc because i really like the idea i've created. i might post it when i actually post the thing on toyhouse and i also will post my roleplay server on toyhouse too. i'm super excited for these two things as they're part of my resolutions. the closed species aspect is also a way for me to practice my character designs and that's something i hope to get better at this year so i am very excited about that. i also want to draw just more in general this year

i think this last entry is gonna be short lol. i have literally nothing to say since i'm gonna say everything in my 2022 page so uhh..happy new years guys!

12.21.22 | 17th birthday
feeling: REALLY GOOD!!!!
listening to/watching: queen bee...i love avu chan
eating/drinking: already brushed my teeth
content warnings: n/a

yesterday was my birthday!!!! when it came to school, the day was pretty mid however i was able to go out for burger king during lunch! usually juniors aren't allowed outside during lunch (for some dumb reason, it's just seniors) but my senior friend snuck me and my other friend out and we got burger king with a coupon that the art teacher gave me. i also finished the poster for the short film festival contest. i turned it in today and my art teacher and the other advisors have already complimented it. i'm pretty sure we're gonna win lmao. today is my sister's birthday! she's turning 12. i got her a cardcaptor sakura sticker but it didn't show up yet :(

being 17 already feels weird. i'm closer to 18. that's strange. i'm sure this will lead to me seeing other 17 year olds and being jealous of their art skills but i suppose that is just the way it goes. only a few teachers wished me a happy birthday which is crazy cause i literally have been talking about my birthday being the 20th for days. but yknow. teachers don't really care. i had a good birthday anyway. all my friends came over and we exchanged and open gifts. we all had hot chocolate and watched spongebob christmas episodes. then we had cake and just hung out for a little. i got pizza hut too!! the weather was nice as well, it was cold but not too cold- same as today

ok but now it's time for the interesting part. showing you all my gifts. that's literally all this entry is gonna be

this was given by my very good friend oreokidrocky on twitter dot com please follow him. this is from oceaninspace! right now her store is closed but please check her out!! such cute stuff. i love the pink strawberry hat and i'm so excited to put it into some of my coords

before you ask, yes she's a bootleg. that's what amazon does. but it doesn't matter too much to me, she's adorable! this is a miku ramen stopper and i think she is the absolute most adorable. i love her outfit especially her hair and her shoes. there's so many little details that makes me so happy like her "01" tattoo having the 0 be a heart. i adore her so much, bootleg or not!

from the same friend who gave me the miku, i got omori socks from!! i think theyre super freaking adorable. i love how the packaging has the omori font and text bubble. i cant wait to use these comfy socks

this is one of four of the books my dear friend got me! it's on neocities too!!! check it out at hillofdespair. this is the eternal edition of the sailor moon manga. i alrrady have the entire manga collection in volumes but i needed the actual collectors edition!! im super happy with this

no way. lesbians. this is the three other books that zerah got me!! nothing is better than adorable yuri manga. i've also heard one of them has the one girl be like bara but for girls. i am absolutely intrigued and will be reading this with my feet kicking in the air and stars in my eyes. i love women and lesbians and

ignore that. onto the next one. this is a charm i got of chie and yukiko! befitting of the lesbian theme. i actually got this last year from my precious little sister but if we're being honest i sort of...lost it so i'm glad to have another!!! i think i'll be putting these sillies on my bookbag so i can always have them with me. things that aren't magical girl stuff for my itabag i usually always put on my bookbag

you guys don't understand how MUCH I LOVE THESE. the artist of these is lone one of my absolutely favorite artists of all time. i think my favorite of these are kaine. i really just love drakenier and i'm so happy that i have some nier merch. there's 4 of them so idk if i'll put them all on my backpack BUT i will put kaine and then maybe zero? i think i'm gonna put the rest on a wallet or other things. this is from the same person who got me the chie and yukiko. thank you!!!

a book! i can read! i think that this is one of the things i'm most excited for. i've been meaning to get this book for like years. i've also not pirated the book because i've been hoping that one year i would get this book for birthday or christmas. thankfully i did! thank you, clover! i'm gonna start bringing this to school so i can read it after break

amiibos!!!! i am so so so excited for these. i love amiibos because they're like cheaper mini figures. i'm also super excited for the amiibo exclusive costumes and stuff that i can get from these. maybe this will convince me to play even more of splatoon 3 lol

and then a gift from my sister! i have one tokyo mew mew omnibus so this is the second one! there's also that tokyo mew mew charm that i'm super excited to put on my itabag. every time i get itabag stuff i get super super excited. i love magical girls. have you guys noticed?

huge disclaimer is that i literally do not like bts. i just absolutely adore these little bt21 guys. ESPECIALLY chimmy. my precious little guy, loved him since 2018. this is one of my favorite gifts i got i think mostly because its practical. i've been wearing it since i got it. it's the cutest and comfiest and warmest hat ever and guess what?! his ears move up and down!!! AHHHHH. i love this one so much

and now, the big one. from my dear friend aidan. the bayonetta funko game stop mystery box. i'm gonna go through all the things that came in here one by one so let's knock this shit out

first, these exclusive funko pops of bayo and jeanne. i love these so much and can't wait to put them on my shelf. i usually don't like funkos but how could i have denied my precious girls? i think they're really cute and surprisingly super accurate to the game!!

i think this was the one i was most excited about. a cheshire plush! i was actually thinking of trying to get this secondhand cause i love cheshire so much but i'm so happy aidan got me this because now i have him!!! maybe if i ever cosplay bayonetta i could use this...

then there's these figures of bayonetta's guns! i love them!! i'm especially happy about how it's all the different ones like rosemary, sage, etc. they're just so cool. i think i might keep them in the box but i'm definitely going to be putting them on display when i find a place for them

lastly, there's this left eye keychain. i think i'll put it somewhere cool so everyone can see i am a huge bayonetta lover and realize i am a lesbian. i think this is super cool and i just love this entire box and everything that came in it. thank you again aidan!!!!

this is my gag gift of the year. i have no comment on it. i will be using it so i don't get carpal tunnel.

thankfully, this gift came from some place that doesn't give direct money to blockberry so i don't feel guilty about having it LMAO. i'm so so so excited to add this to my collection though. i finally have birdseul.....

MORE ITABAG STUFF!!! these things im so so so happy about because like i said before, anything that i can put on my itabag i get absolutely giddy over. i love the pins they're so high quality and i'm so happy to have more utena stuff. i really am like so fucking pleased with these and i cant wait to show it off whenever i go out with my itabag

and the last birthday gift i got! ignore the image quality i opened it at like 10pm. this is from my bestest dear friend emmy (p3p on neocities please check her out). it makes me so fucking happy that people actually listen to my insane precure rambles and can remember who my favorite is. cure sunshine is my favorite. hes so gender. i'm so lucky to have such good friends and such cute gifts!!!

that's my huge birthday haul. this will probably not be what i do for christmas because this was absolutely so fucking draining

12.18.22 | shaping up to be a wonderful holiday
listening to/watching: barbie a christmas carol (2008)
eating/drinking: wendys and sweet tea
content warnings: n/a

two days two days! my birthday is in two days!! i'm so so so excited. i honestly can't wait. my friends are all coming over after school and i'm getting the big pizza hut family box. pizza hut is like a fancy dinner to me since we NEVER get to have it. they don't deliver to us! and my mom rarely wants to actually get up and drive there. so it's my birthday dinner. i'm not sure what cake i'm getting but i think i might want an ice cream cake. since all my friends are coming over, i need to do the gift exchange on the 20th but a lot of my gifts for my friends aren't here yet @__@ i'm worried but i'm sure things will work out even if they're late. similarly, i'm not done with cards. but i'm working on it!

we won't have snow for christmas- i'm really upset about that :( but snow isn't the only thing that makes things feel like christmas. there's also all these movies and cookies and all the eggnog i've been having. god, i just love this time of year. i love my birthday too. it's 8pm so it's pratically only one day til my birthday. i really can't even talk about anything that isn't my birthday, huh?

yesterday, me and my friends decided to start the caligula effect. the first game sucks. i talked about it on my blog but i really can't stress how much it sucks. i like the lesbian though and it was extremely funny for one of the npcs to have a "multiple personality disorder" trauma. that was very hilarious. i am still kind of interested in it despite this first game sucking a lot though. i simply cannot like actually good games i guess. either way, its also almost time for my gc's holiday replay of hello charlotte. i've been meaning to start a hello charlotte shrine but i've been working on most of my personal pages currently. i think when i'm finished with the basic layout of those i will actually do the cool stuff. the thing is, the personal pages are easy and simple layouts. however, i want the shrines/other stuff to be way more complex so that's why i've been focusing on these things. at least i do have a large chunk of my yume nikki fangame shrine/site done. you can find that over on ynfgs

today in my tumblr recommended was the corefrisk tumblr blog. did you know that's still sort of active? it was literally a nostalgia blast because i was so into all those undertale aus when i was younger/when it first came out. i would listen to those "boss fight themes of all aus" and go through everyone's tumblr tags of their aus. there was a tumblr blog that held all the aus and i would just go through that whenever i wanted to. i'm hoping i don't go into my undertale hyperfixation again because of this but. that's fine. those were the good old days when people still used skype

i think im going to go work on my christmas cards and wrap the rest of the gifts i have. i really need to get that shit done so i can actually give people their gifts for the 20th. jesus christ. maybe i'll just give the rest on the 23rd. wish me luck!

12.12.22 | ah distinctly i remember, it was in the bleak december
feeling: fine
listening to/watching: ranking every family guy episode ever
eating/drinking: iced sweet tea
content warnings: n/a

today's weather really makes it feel like christmas. i woke up to a thin layer of snow. it had melted by the time that i was getting home from school, but the comfort of a snowy december night feeling still lingers. the next possible snow should be on thursday and i can't stress how excited i am. there's something so warm about snow to me- ironic since it's freezing. the rest of the day was full of very cold rain and melting snow, creating quite annoying sounds on the roof of my school. the weather has been keeping me going these past few days. i love the cold, and i love busting out my snow jacket and boots.

school today was mediocre. i didn't really have much fun things happen and i only did a bit of my art work done. it's due saturday at 11:59PM so i'm trying my best but lord is it hard to speedrun art. when it came to schoolwork, i don't have a lot of homework but i do have a lot of specifically this one project to do but my teacher for some reason never gives us due dates until like the day of. it's extremely annoying and makes me very stressed out when it's actual projects but thankfully it hadn't been actual ones for a while. however, this one is a big ass project and so i'm angry. i'm also reading the great gatsby which is completely different from what i expected??? why is it so fucking homoerotic? my teacher has some sort of weird love of saying there's no gay subtext. she said it would be perverted if fitzgerald included gay men having sex which is insane to tell to your class who ALL thinks that they fucked. but i digress. we all make fun of her anyway.

as of now, i'm sitting in my bed as the amazing world of gumball plays on shuffle. i really need to start working on my "ranking ever tawog episode" thing again. i know someone else did it but I HAD THE IDEA FIRST!!! plus the only reason i stopped working on it for a while is cause my grandfather died. maybe next year ill try to get it out. someone should help with editing though teeheeteehee. i've been meaning to make some youtube videos and i'm really hoping next year i'm gonna actually do things. i'll try to get a "what i got my friends for christmas" video as well just as a beginner. it might be really embarrassing to film but hey i just wanna be a youtuber artist blogger game dev writer. that's a lot, huh? at least it's doing things that i like and want to. lenore (my cat) is cuddling right next to me right now. she is the absolute most adorable and i feel so bad that when i finish this entry i am going to have to move and bother her.

i don't think there was much else of importance today that wasn't just me sitting down and laughing with my friends over their stupidity in discord. oh, yeah well i did watch the muppets family christmas special. ok well, watch is an overstatement. i fell asleep like halfway through and woke up to see jim henson which made me a little bit emotional. i love the muppets so much and i miss jim henson even though i obviously wasn't alive when he was. he's just such an inspiration to me and my creations. i feel like if i were to fail at actual art i would make puppets/be a puppeteer or make animatronics. but that's something i'll worry about when i become a starving artist

i think the last thing that happened today is just me finishing my rewatch of ls mark's ranking family guy video. that was fun

12.7.22 | woes of a highschool art student
feeling: excited..but stressed
listening to/watching: the polar express
eating/drinking: hot chocolate and peanut butter kiss cookies
content warnings: n/a

as of today, it's around 13 (more like 12 now that it's night time but still) days until my birthday! i'm gonna be 17, which is really really weird. thankfully, i like to ignore the inevitability of time passing by thinking about presents. when you're as poor as me, unfortunately you become pretty materialistic. that's not really a bad thing, all people enjoy presents, but it sucks cause then people constantly try to demonize you because "money can't buy happiness!". well, it can buy things that can make me happy so fuck off. the christmas season really just reminds me of how classist lots of people are but i try to not let it get the better of me. it's a fun season anyway and i seriously just love the christmas time. how many times have i said that in these diaries?? probably lots already! i'm commonly known as someone who repeats things and that's because i have adhd. yeah. we've been super into making christmas sweets lately like grinch cupcakes, melting snowman cookies, and just regular cookies. and i've been having hot chocolate like every single second. my christmas tree has been set up too and we're probably decorating it as soon as possible. my house and living room right now just feels so comfortable with all the christmas stuff. very nostalgic

yesterday, i attended a zoom meeting for my summer art program i'm planning on attending. it was really interesting and made me even more excited to go. i seriously can't wait. i feel like it's such a good idea for me to go to a summer program because it will let me try to be away from home and really hone my skills. plus they do a ton of field trips and i'll have so much original art that i can do and inspiration. i also have finished all my stuff for the scholarship applications for the program so when they drop i will be able to immediately get on that shit. i'm also working on some art for the scholastic art competition even though it's due in 10 days. i think that i may just be insane thinking that i could get a few things done for it and i really don't know why i had never heard of it before when the submissions actually just opened but uhhh here i am anyway. it's a good thing that i'm doing all this art though since i'm able to submit it for my AP art application. oh yeah. AP art. i'm doing that next year. most people say it's not worth it but i think it's gonna be fun. lots of art stuff! i'm excited

and now. it's time for the sad part of the art stuff. i have so much art i wanna do but i really have so much schoolwork so it's so difficult to actually get things done. i think that the summer program will probably change that entire problem but then again there's the fact that i'm well. poor. i know that literally my tax return has $0 and that should be enough evidence that i need financial aid but it still is scary to do a competitive scholarship. along with that, i took way too long to even hear about the scholastic art and writing competition. it's due literally in 7 days. i'm a little bit scared about that but even if i just get one in i will be happy. i feel like i've been really lacking in art skills lately. i think it really comes down to being poor if im gonna be honest. i understand you can teach yourself stuff and that's really what i've always done, but there's also the fact that because i have so little money that means i don't have art supplies that are really good. i try my best but i dont have like any experience with certain tools. please just hope and pray if you're into that that i get into the scholarship for this program...

i'm doing a cover art for a short film festival for my school. me and my friend ( peep her neocities) are doing a collab for it. she's doing the sketching plus the final render and im doing the colors plus a part of the image itself. the prize is $50 but since it's two of us we would have to split it. hey, money is money. but i'm pissed since the art classes made it an assignment and as such that means we have MORE competition. i really do NOT wanna have to go against all the AP art students. i doubt we will win because of this but i'm still trying.

i think by now i have like all my christmas presents. there's like 3 other people i still need to grab some stuff for but i'm planning on just doing it at a store we're visiting soon. i spent a LOT of money but because i'm getting actually good paychecks from my work now, i can actually do that. money is fun. i enjoy having money. after christmas season im so excited for me to just not have to worry about things that much anymore. i love this time but it's also STRESSFUL. but hey. birthday soon!

i think that's all i have to say for today...maybe i'll have more interesting things later. for now i leave you with wips of my art for the competitions i'm doing. just open them in a new tab to actually look at them